I have a confession to make…starting this blog and continuing to grow and develop it has been a REALLY scary process for me. I have so many ideas that I want to share with you, so many things that I want to do through this platform – I want to write you an ebook, I want to lead workshops and give lectures, I want to start to carry cool fitness retail, and I want to impact your life every single day with meaningful content. I started working in the fitness industry because, for many years, I made unhealthy choices physically, mentally, and emotionally – and I don’t want anyone else to have to go through it alone! I want everyone to find their inner self-worth and work toward healthy goals like strength and wellness. I want to end the self-shaming and punishment and I want you to truly find the things that make you happy and practice happiness everyday.
My goal is to help you define your life from the inside out.
These are lofty goals, and for the past few months I’ve been terrified by them. What if I spend a ton of time, energy, money, and passion on these projects and no one likes it? What if I’m all alone at a workshop presenting to no one? What if I upgrade my website with a bunch of shiny bells and whistles and only 10 people view my page? On and on this self-doubt went and my reservations grew and grew. I became paralyzed by this fear. Instead of taking actions to move forward, I took steps backward justifying to myself that with enough reading, research, and prep I would feel ready to proceed. However all this prep for perfection, all this pumping of the breaks, is me just stalling because I’m scared.
The first step in facing my fears, came in admitting to a really good friend and mentor of mine that I was, in fact, scared to fail. Even just admitting that out loud to someone began the process of helping me to face my fears. My friend went on to ask me what truly terrible things would happen if I did actually fail? I thought about it and imagined the failures, one after another. Even though each scenario kind of sucked, I didn’t die. Failure isn’t a permanent state – but I was allowing the fear of failure to keep me paralyzed in a state of inaction.
Here’s what I’m learning while working through my fears to reach my goals: if fear is your foundation, then there is no room for genuine inner strength or progress. Through the eyes of fear we can only see threats, danger, and doom – none of those things encourage us to move forward. Fear can be all consuming. When we are fearful we can’t allow other emotions like joy, happiness, or excitement to surface. Fear robs us of our inner power and passion. Making decisions from a place of fear is the epitome of playing small and if your goals are big and grand, there’s no room for small. That doesn’t mean that fear can’t be a helpful too. In small doses, fear can be helpful because it keeps us humble, keeps our egos in check, and the bump in adrenalin can give us extra energy and heightened awareness – but we can’t let fear be the foundation for our actions (or inactions).
So today, I’m going to ask you to look at your goals, the things that you want most in your life and ask yourself what’s truly standing in your way. Is it fear? Acknowledge it, look that fear square in the face and take your power back. It’s time for us all to stop playing small and work from a foundation of strength, passion, confidence.